The Art of Choosing
Dr. Sheena Lyengar a world renowned expert on the subject of choice discusses
the following three assumptions:
First assumption: if a choice affects you, then you should be the one to make
it. This is the only way to ensure that your preferences and interests will be
most fully accounted for. It is essential for success. In America, the primary
locus of choice is the individual. People must choose for themselves, sometimes
sticking to their guns, regardless of what other people want or recommend. It's
called "being true to yourself."
I am often reluctant to stick to my guns when it comes to my younger
sisters. Most of the time, I find myself giving in or being manipulated into
handing out money for a job never fulfill. My sisters are still young and like
any old sister, I hope and wish the very best for them. However, I must be a
good role model and provide valuable insight on what it means to become an
adult. For example: My sister Shana gets a traffic ticket for and accident that
essentially was not her fault. (She was stopped at a stop sign, it was dark and
the oncoming car did not have its lights on. Shana began to pull out just a
little before she was struck by the car.) The ticket cost $160.00 and was due
in 30 days from the date of the accident. Within that thirty day period, Shana,
my mom and myself spent endless hours trying to help Shana fix her car until my
mom forgot to put antifreeze in the radiator and blew it up. Devastated, Shana
decided to sell the car to a junk yard for $400.00 (the initial price in which
she purchased the car). After the car was sold, I told Shana that she will want
to pay off her ticket, open a bank account and save the rest of money from the
sale until she has enough money saved to purchase a new car. Did Shana listen;
did she pay off her ticket or save the money? NO!!! Shana bought a cat, went
out to dinner and went shopping. Then a month later when the ticket was due,
guess who came knocking at my door. At this point I had, had enough; I told
Shana that choices sometimes have negative consequences and that she will need
to figure out how to pay her ticket on her own. The choice I made was to not
give in and stick to my guns. I realized that in order for my sisters to learn
valuable life lesions I must allow them to make their own mistakes and figure
out their own solutions.
The second assumption which informs the “American view” of choice is… The
more choices you have, the more likely you are to make the best choice.
I both agree with this and disagree with this statement. Although having a
lot of choices can be great (offering a wider variety), I feel that having too
many choices can be overwhelming and confusing, thus causing you to doubt or
second guess the initial choice you made.
The third assumption reminds views to never say no to a choice. Sheena uses the
following example to demonstrate the importance of choice. A young couple,
Susan and Daniel Mitchell, were about to have their first baby. They'd already
picked out a name for her, Barbara, after her grandmother. One night, when
Susan was seven months pregnant, she started to experience contractions and was
rushed to the emergency room. The baby was delivered through a C-section, but
Barbara suffered cerebral anoxia, a loss of oxygen to the brain. Unable to
breathe on her own, she was put on a ventilator. Two days later, the doctors
gave the Mitchells a choice: They could either remove Barbara off the life
support, in which case she would die within a matter of hours, or they could
keep her on life support, in which case she might still die within a matter of
days. If she survived, she would remain in a permanent vegetative state, never
able to walk, talk or interact with others. What do they do? What does any
parent do?
This example automatically made me think about my dog Peanut, she was a 14 year
old Dachshund, Chihuahua mix. Near the end of her life Steven and I were given
a choice to allow Peanut to continue living in her current state (having an
enlarged heart, being overweight and unable to breathe normally) or to put her
to sleep. Ultimately we wanted to keep Peanut alive for as long as possible;
however, we knew that it was selfish of us to choose to keep Peanut alive. So…
we did what we thought was best for Peanut and put her to rest. The most
difficult thought to overcome in making the choice we did was choosing not to
be present when the doctor actually put her to sleep. Due to this choice, I
often wonder if she felt lost and abandoned in her time of need.
Dr. Sheena Lyengar portrays the following leadership implications in her
lecture:
Americans have so often tried to disseminate their ideas of choice, believing
that they will be, or ought to be, welcomed with open hearts and minds. But the
history books and the daily news tell us it doesn't always work out that way.
The phantasmagoria, the actual experience that we try to understand and
organize through narrative, varies from place to place. No single narrative
serves the needs of everyone everywhere. Moreover, Americans themselves could
benefit from incorporating new perspectives into their own narrative, which has
been driving their choices for so long.
Robert Frost once said that, "It is poetry that is lost in
translation." This suggests that whatever is beautiful and moving,
whatever gives us a new way to see, cannot be communicated to those who speak a
different language. But Joseph Brodsky said that, "It is poetry that is
gained in translation," suggesting that translation can be a creative,
transformative act. When it comes to choice, we have far more to gain than to
lose by engaging in the many translations of the narratives. Instead of
replacing one story with another, we can learn from and revel in the many
versions that exist and the many that have yet to be written. No matter where
we're from and what your narrative is, we all have a responsibility to open
ourselves up to a wider array of what choice can do, and what it can represent.
And this does not lead to a paralyzing moral relativism. Rather, it teaches us
when and how to act. It brings us that much closer to realizing the full
potential of choice, to inspiring the hope and achieving the freedom that
choice promises but doesn't always deliver. If we learn to speak to one
another, albeit through translation, then we can begin to see choice in all its
strangeness, complexity and compelling beauty.
Websites:
http://sheenaiyengar.com/
http://www.ted.com/talks/lang/eng/sheena_iyengar_on_the_art_of_choosing.html
